I have always believed in true friendships, and I thought that I was also blessed with having a true friend. But my recent situation made me doubt it severely, and now I just don’t know how to proceed with my best friend of 20 years. After my immense kindness towards her, she unexpectedly turned out to be a real monster, and I just don’t know how I missed the evil features in her attitude before.”

Shannon continues, “My (33F) best friend (30F) recently lost her husband, home and all income. Her spouse suddenly passed and he was the only breadwinner. She and her 2 kids had nowhere to go, so we took them in until she can save up enough to get an apartment.
Cringy and trashy things started happening after a week of their stay. I noticed that she was being very aggressive toward my kids (13-year-old daughter and 12-year-old son). Initially, I thought her behavior was a result of the intense stress she was under due to her difficult life circumstances. However, one day, I came home from work early and overheard her yelling at my daughter.”

“She was calling her ’fat’ and loudly insisting that she needed to stop eating so much pizza. I was stunned—I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. After calming down my crying daughter, I confronted Abby, my best friend, about her behavior. She responded by claiming that she was just trying to help me raise my kids ’properly,’ like a real mother would. She even went so far as to accuse me of being a negligent mother, insisting my kids were spoiled, and saying my daughter, in particular, would be teased at school because of her ’weight.’”

“This led to a major argument. I told her to stay out of my family’s business and reminded her that she was a guest in my home, not someone who could dictate how things should be. I warned her to start acting like a guest. Yet, despite everything, I couldn’t bring myself to ask her to leave for good.
I still felt sorry for her, believing deep down that she wasn’t a bad person, and that her actions were just a result of her personal struggles and the trauma she had faced. Unfortunately, things only got worse, and I soon regretted my decision to be so forgiving.”

Shannon wrote, “Although Abby had stopped yelling at my kids, it was too soon to say the conflict was over. After she’d been staying with us for about a month, I started noticing things in my and my husband’s bedroom were out of place.”

“At first, I didn’t think much of it, assuming my husband, Adam, had moved a few things around without mentioning it. But when I realized that items in my jewelry box had been rearranged, I spoke to Adam. Naturally, he had no idea what I was talking about—why would he have any reason to touch my jewelry?”

“At that point, I suspected it might be my 13-year-old daughter, so I gently confronted her, promising not to get angry if she was honest about going through my things. She insisted she hadn’t touched anything in our bedroom, especially not my jewelry box. I trusted her, which left only one person: Abby. I doubted she’d admit to anything if I asked, so I decided to set up a small camera in our bedroom and another in the hallway. It didn’t take long to uncover the disturbing truth.”
Shannon wrote, “A few days after installing the cameras, I reviewed the recordings, and what I saw made me want to scream. My best friend was using my bed for romantic encounters with a man I had never seen before. Not only had she invited a stranger into my home, but she used my bed for her intimate activities. It was disgusting, but that wasn’t the worst part.”

“I saw her trying on my clothes, my jewelry, and even my underwear, which was so revolting that I nearly threw up. She did this daily, and even met up with her ’boyfriend’ while wearing my clothes! Her behavior left me completely shocked. Later that day, I didn’t confront Abby. I quietly gathered her belongings, packed them into her bags, and left them outside my house.”

“When she returned with her kids after picking them up from school and kindergarten, she found her things neatly waiting for her outside. I can imagine she was furious—she even cried and called and messaged me repeatedly, begging for forgiveness. But I didn’t answer her calls or messages. Instead, I asked a mutual friend to check on her and the kids to make sure they were safe.
Once I knew she was okay and had a place to stay, I deleted Abby’s number from my phone and have gone completely no contact since. Am I a bad person for kicking her out?”