I recently married Robert and was excited to host our first Thanksgiving as newlyweds in our new home. We invited both our families, but my mother-in-law took a special interest in organizing the dinner. When she said she’d “bring some order,” I thought she meant helping with dishes, but instead, she showed up with printed copies of her “Family Code of Conduct,” insisting everyone read and sign it. Her six rules were:

1. No phones at the table to “encourage genuine connection.”
2. Pre-approved conversation topics only, avoiding anything too personal or negative.
3. Mandatory “What I’m Thankful For” speeches, at least 2 minutes long.
4. No unvetted dishes; recipes must be approved.
5. One speaker at a time during dinner, like a “debate club.”
6. A designated end time to avoid lingering and conflict.

I was shocked, but this was her idea of a perfect Thanksgiving.